Wednesday, July 22, 2009

That Crazy Thing Called LOVE

Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength; loving someone deeply gives you courage. ~ Lao Tzu

I wanted to start writing a blog tonight about how much Twitter has inspired me...but I'll have to save that for next time, as it got trumped by this blog about that thing we call LOVE.

What is the magical thing about LOVE – that inspires, encourages and invigorates us when it hits? When it happens, it usually throws us off kilter for days, weeks, even longer.

What is it about love that makes us take such pleasure and joy in the little things, the silly things about the object of our affections? That in loving them, we love everything about them – the way their nose sits on their face, the way their eyes penetrate through our soul when they look at us, or their hands shake when they talk, or the way their brilliant minds work, or how a little drool comes from their mouth every so often when they talk. That being with that person makes everything else go away as we feel that nothing else, other than that moment of being together, matters.

And why is it that when it happens, so often we retreat, afraid to be totally honest and put it all on the line for the one we love? Why do we often feel we have to protect ourselves and when might we be able to be totally truthful with ourselves and them?

I’m starting to realize the power of this thing called LOVE. When you really love someone, you give them the space they need to be who they are and to do what they need to do. Loving someone means respecting them in their journey and trusting that if it is meant to be it will be. Loving someone is knowing deep down that no matter what their love looks like in return, that we can still make the conscious choice to love them pure and simply.

Love is not needing a partner but wanting a partner. Love is not asking how much I must do, but how much I can do. Love is allowing someone to just be.

In my book, BEing the Present: 101 Ways to Inspire Living and Giving (, I wrote about loving fully (#25). I wrote that love is about risking, loving 100% and loving all the way rather than part of the way because of a fear of the other person’s reaction, of what they might think or that they might not love you back as fully.

But that is what love is. When you love fully and unconditionally, it doesn’t matter whether they love you back, nor if the way they love you back is the way you wish for it or want it to look. When we love someone and allow them to be who they are, we are allowing ourselves to be who we are and loving and respecting ourselves in the process.

You can find me on Twitter @pilarstella and Facebook

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